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about

An album about morality and online dating.
Fuck Damien Hirst

credits

released July 26, 2016

All songs written and recorded by Harris at Grant's Haus in 2016
Mixed and Mastered by Jo
Special thanks to Mom, Jo, Harrison, Isaac, Jimmy, Sky, Andrea (for letting me use her name), Carbon, Kohl, Mia, Jack, D, Tucker, Chloe, Jade, Jake, Dyl, Alex, Weez, Morg, Perk, and all the other people that believe in me

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all rights reserved

about

you beside me while i have a heart attack Portland, Oregon

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Track Name: Subconscious attempts at doing Nothing
In the living room when I sit with mom theres a piece of you thats never gone, it seeps into subconscious attempts at doing nothing or it colors just more apathy in meaning, when I talk with friends about having kids there’s always this marked hesitation when I say that I’m not sure but I know it means I’d rather have more summers of not fucking up. I haven’t got a christmas card for the past three years, have you give up? That shit doesn’t get better yeah thats a permanent scar every time you’re brought up it’s like a crash without cars, I’m so jolted and livid I wish I could just see the love in it. Yet I’ll forever be jaded by your comments in angst when you’d talk about space but wouldn’t let me have space. When my favorite shoes were like six different colors, when you called the cops I guess it’s what I deserved
Track Name: Emily/Star sign
Why you always tryn to fall asleep in bed beside me
i wanna fuck around until were both tired
i want break your legs and light my head on fire
Your’e not in love with me you love my star sign
its not my whole story its just the best lines
like I’m the key of g and your a peace sign

So fuck it, everything ends, so fuck it, nothing lasts

why u always gotta leave right when we start having fun
I’m just tryina feel your bones not meet your parents
feel a difference in my stress when you’re around impairing it
see how you look with that dress when you don’t wear it
I’m not trying to talk about my daddy issues with you
I’m sorry if that’s blunt but i’m just trying to chill dude

If that doesn’t work for you we can say fuck it, everything ends, nothing lasts
Track Name: Xanax
even when we’re caught in the wash of the rain or when the tears blend with rain and there is nothing to say i still feel like I’ve lost something to a lost cause in vain for you
with yours nothing like love but its still something like love there a tiger in bed with me it rips up my blood and when I’m finally flaccid your the thing that just happens I’m trying to describe us but I’m not doing it justice

Its so hard to think on xanax but its harder to brave it
your didn’t drive to aurora mother fucker just don’t fake it
good things die don’t waste ur life trying to save it
Till death I’ll keep stealing pills to be okay
everyday i feel like brendan fraiser just trying to buy groceries
broke/ broken as fuck but trying to hide it from everybody
load the chemical sadness into the top of a shotty
i just can’t wait until I’m again a thing without body

its like eating nothing for breakfast and then liquor for lunch
it like you love me a bunch but you don’t love me a bunch
and that there is something unsettling and that you have a hunch
that I’m guilt of something fuck I feel guilty too much
I dont wanna wear your old shoes till i breath a hypothermia blue
it like everything news old news even hot flame with you turns light blue

it so hard to think sober and its just so easy to fake it
you’ll never visit again mother fucker just say it
when all the good things die just get fucking wasted
you can just give up on life and chill like me in my basement
you can grow new comfort in sadness or in anguish
and when the telephone rings you can choose not to take it
and you burn down your old house and stay safe in the basement
or you can keep stealing pills from your brother till you make it
Track Name: Karen's in love with a married Woman
Karens in love with a married woman who said shell leave her husband for her
But that bitch is a harpie, she doesn’t really mean mean it but karen just won’t listen to reason
Oh its so sweet from across the street to watch the tragedy dettached like it’s my tv screen
To watch karen unfold in that that heartless bitch's arms
to see her become like a child again
I see her daughter being lonely through the living room window And i wonder if she knows her mothers plight or feels bad
If she’s acquainted with the stress from the constant exposure so that when she finally leaves she'll vow to never come back
but oh its so sweet from across the street to watch the tragedy detached like its my TV screen
To watch a family decay from that heartless bitches charm
to see the tides of hope become mild again
Track Name: Just Krishna
I hate talking to my mom on the phone she just tells me what I did wrong
I hate talking to my dad on the phone we haven’t talked in oh so long
I just hate listening in general OH
Last night I drowned myself in monotony my will oh so strong

And oh I wish I was special
That affection didn’t just map onto proper names
That I didn’t consist of coherent parts
and I could just be one with krishna
If I could just be one with krishna
I’d submit to the godhead

I hate telling all my friends how I feel cause they can’t empathize with me
It’s like they hear what I mean but my face is a screen and they watch me like Im tv
I just look forward to my emotional masterbation is so nice
to release and feel clean when alone in my sheets, soaking in myself late into night

And oh I wish I was special
That affection didn’t just map onto proper names
That I didn’t consist of coherent parts
and I could just be one with krishna
If I could just be one with krishna
I’d submit to the godhead
Track Name: I Saw You in my Cereal Last Tuesday Morning
Saw you in the cereal last tuesday morning hows your life
hows it feel to be so different after all the years
are you still caught in the black slime of high school regional debate competition with a judge with bad intention who passes you notes asking you if you want to make out in the bathroom
Are you still winning
are you in alpha beta chi
am I still the first boy that you loved or did that i love you die
Track Name: I'll never date another girl who has a word as her first name (you taught me my lesson)
come on little sleeper I want to get inside your head i want to see what thoughts of me look like in mind of the other
am I really slightly boring, are my social skills engaging, do you like me more when we’ve been drinking, is that the only time you like me
do you ever feel like you’ve lost a person and that now is an intermission on a larger scale engagement between you and and a love thats at war
do you ever feel like poison can take the shape of waiting and faking that now can serve as a reminding sequence of the things you had before
why can’t we just do speed in my bedroom and be in love like we used to be
why can’t we just do speed in my bedroom and not over think what you are to me
why can’t we just do speed in my bedroom and never go to sleep
and never go to sleep, and never go to sleep
I wish I could just go back and shroud myself in past ignorance or arrogance and think that things were real again, and that the world comes preeminently parsed
That all things that happen are done with good intention and those that fake it till they make it can still make out with depression and that theres nothing really bad that doesn’t set good things in motion, that things are only bad because of ill placed devotions
why can’t we just do speed in my bedroom and be in love like we used to be
why can’t we just do speed in my bedroom and not over think what you are to me
why can’t we just do speed in my bedroom and never go to sleep
and never go to sleep, and never go to sleep
Track Name: School Shooter
cooters got a new computer he’s gonna photoshop his girlfriend so that she looks cuter
so he can show her off to all his internet friends
when people like his things he feels so intense
He’s always feels an empathy for the shooter, that somebodys got the balls to play the role of the muter, he’s a sick mother fucker who just get stupider and stupider that computers a place for only the deepest deluders
I will react to you if you’ll react to me even if only through the screen
I will be there for you if you’ll be there for me even if only through the screen
cooters got a new computer that holds his hand as he masterbates to her
he’s so plugged into the router his even his H+ friends think he’s problem user
but but tonight tonight tonight hell change all there minds
he’s going out to columbine to unwind one last time
I will react to you if you’ll react to me even if only through the screen
I will be there for you if you’ll be there for me even if only through the screen
Track Name: Tragedy in Reincarnate
tragic reincarnate of the old desire you will always manifest through the hearts of the dead
bundled in a passion you mean nothing to new world you are nothing but a mother to a thing that is gone
feeling loving slipping sleeping theres something thats appealing in refusal to submit to the beast
causing torutre after torture making up your own submission god
you are fucked up self important my god lay it to rest

a glass of blood that is half empty filtered through a pessimism god i just want you to see it i want you to believe
that the trees are painting murder on the side of a cathedral that a fucked up system gave us god i want to conceive
of pain without a body but i just can’t feel a complex mental state or real emotion ever since we broke creed
that theres some ceramic organ thats and it takes too long to ship here so I’m out of commission for the next three weeks
Track Name: Andrea
andrea i thought we had something time couldn’t take from us
but like fish in eeries water or an irradiated father
good things decompose
maybe if we hold the past tight enough
it can hold out in our memory until times are tough
we can just tread old water and forget that we are sinking
while we decompose
after the sun burns out I’m hoping there’ll be freedom
on an ice cold rock we’ll live on where love alone’s a reason
to continue through the ice age and find a newer lucky star
i hope in the future that’ll be where we are
andrea i thought you’d be my love for some forever
i know it wasn’t perfect but some skin just feels better
on my face when its the evening nothings been the same since
you shed your old exterior
maybe i can find the old coat you once called your own
and make a perfect model of you thats there when i get home
I feel like endlessly involved in
trying to recreate your warmth
after the sun burns out I’m hoping there’ll be freedom
on an ice cold rock we’ll live on where love alone’s a reason
to continue through the ice age and find a newer lucky star
i hope in the future that’ll be where we are